Acknowledgement

I'm acknowledging and tying to make peace with the fact that I'm not going to be losing 4-5 lbs every week anymore.  I'll only be losing 1-2, maybe 3 lbs if I'm LUCKY.


And that's okay... I think.


I know that I've been focused mainly on my weight loss goals... which I am succeeding at.  I actually read through my first post and saw that my goal was to lose 40 lbs by the end of the summer... a goal which I am actually going to complete!


But I think I need to look at my other goals.  This is a complete transformation.  I'm changing everything inside and out.

Goals:

1. Be outgoing  -  I have mixed feelings about my progress on this goal.  I have found that I can be extremely outgoing in certain situations, but in others I completely shut down.  For example, there is a guy I am interested in… but I shut down every time he tries to talk to me.  My family has even noticed, which means he has probably noticed… ummm embarrassing.  However, when I’m at a church function or in the grocery store I have no problems carrying on conversations with people.  HELP.

2. Exercise & Lose weight. LOTS of it.  -  No need for a refresher on that one… that’s going well.

3. Laugh more  -  There has been significant progress on this goal.  I’m finding humor in everything now.  When I find humor that leads to…

4. Make others laugh more  -  This!  I am really good at this.  I make my mom, my grandma, my dad, and my friends laugh all the time.  Shedding all this excess weight (physical and emotional) has helped me uncover my comedic side.

 
5. Serve others  -  Not doing much pubic/community service as of now.  I’m trying to do lots of things around the house and I’m trying to be supportive of other people trying to change their life via blogs and twitter.  It’s not much… but it’s better than nothing.

6. Get to know God again  -  I’m slowly beginning to believe/trust in God again.  I try to have frequent conversations with Him.  My eyes are slowly able to see Him in small moments of everyday.  I understand on a fundamental level that He is helping me with my journey… much of my success has to be attributed to Him.  He put amazing people in my life who have turned out to be incredible supporters.  He has given me the strength to be committed and dedicated to my goals… because I can promise that I don’t have the strength to do it on my own.

7. Be happy  -  Progress on this is exponential.  I feel better than I have in years.  I can honestly say I am happier now than I was in high school or college.  I don’t want my followers, friends, or family members to think that this has been influenced by them… I was only unhappy for the last 8 years because I was unhappy with myself.  I tried to convince myself that it was because I didn’t have a boyfriend, or I wasn’t married, or because I didn’t have money or material possessions… but the real reason was because I didn’t like who I was.  Whi'le I've had amazing friends and family that supported me, recognized my value and worth, and loved me regardless of my imperfections, none of that really matters when you don’t see anything good about yourself… you can’t ever be truly happy when you don’t care about yourself.  But that has all changed.  I’m beginning to genuinely care about myself and that has made the world of difference in my overall happiness. 

Wow.  Can we say word vomit?   

Until next time loyal followers (whom I love oh so very much).